Scam Jam

intro tumbi

phone ringing

Verse 1

Hello yes madam, you have the viruus,

I fix now, before it spread to the big puus.

I am from Microsoft, very big name,

Why you doubt me, are you insane?

Clicky-click, give me the code,

Your PayPal open, I take the load.

Don't worry, I am your friend,

Just give me giftcard — and press "Send".

scream

Do Not Redeem!!!!!!!! Why!!!! Madam!!!

Pre-Chorus

Mundiya to bach ke rahi

Nahi tu hun hun hui mutiyar

Mundiya to bach ke rahi

My name is John, but in real I’m Rakesh,

Eating samosa while I empty your cash.

In call center, I am king of fraud,

My manager say, “You make grandma applaud!”

Chorus

I scam, I jam, I RAM your files,

Put curry on keyboard and smile for miles.

I sound like saint, but I’m naughty beast,

While you cry, I have chai and feast.

Ohhh, I’m not sorry, I’m just slick,

With your pension fund I buy selfie stick.

I’m John (you fool), Rakesh (at home),

I scammed your mum — now I buy new phone.

scream

Noo!!! Madam!!!! Do not redeem!!!

Verse 2

Nahi tu hun hun hui mutiyar

Mundiya to bach ke rahi, yeah

Oh madam, you see pop-up, yes?

That’s not virus, that’s my success.

“You won iPad!” — ho ho, you wish.

But I got iPad, and big gold fish.

I fake the voice, I fake the fear,

You give control, now I steer!

You are white trash, filthy dog,

I say you suck my cog.

Bridge: Spoken, Dramatic Accent

"Madam, do not click away,

You click — boom! Whole system go kabooooom!

I am certified Level 11 Technician,

From Google University of Invention."

Chorus

I lie, I sigh, I fake the truth,

Got ten fake licenses in my booth.

I whisper sweetly, like buttered naan,

Then download virus straight from Iran.

Your files now mine, your soul too slow,

I’m Rakesh bhai, welcome to the show.

I’m John (on call), Rakesh (in flesh),

Your desktop mine — and your cash is fresh.

Outro – Jazzy Breakdown

I buy my mum new washing machine,

With tears of boomers I keep it clean.

But don’t be sad, you learned today:

Never trust guy who say: “Do what I say.”

scream

"Do Not Redeem!!!"

"fack you madam you shit piece!!!"

spoken dialogue

“Thank you and goodbye… I hope your PC explodes, madam.”

click FX